LOSING.LOST.FOUND

It’s so easy to see the future and think of what could be or what should be .. to perfectly paint your life including the people you see in it ... you so easily conform to the image ,you minimize yourself to keep that picture painted so perfectly.Going through the motions and living off of perception. When the picture you painted is no longer so clear, when the people you see in it slowly disappear, when your life is no longer picture perfect who do you become? Who do you blame ? It’s hard to see that you’ve lost your way.. that you’ve started to live your life to conform to that life you painted so long ago. You have to be the perfect girlfriend to become a wife that now you are only a girlfriend with a life dedicated to one goal . You want to make your father proud and show him you will be successful , now your whole life is dedicated to satisfying one ideal of success, you want to prove your good enough all while ignoring yourself and reaching for a good on other people’s spectrums and lowering your own self worth. We get lost. Lost in the picture we painted in that moment , when that boyfriend isn’t meeting up to your standards to become a husband or when your father couldn’t even make you proud , when those people aren’t even good enough to value themselves ... we are still pushing for that goal not realizing all that have changed around us. Lost in translation. Vision focused on that one picture. Tuned in and not willing to come out the daze that the picture was never perfect and it never will be because when you painted it , you put everyone in mind except for yourself. You came last. You lost the race when you made it your duty to allow other to make your picture perfect. You lost yourself when the things you valued became optional. You lost the picture when the painter lost the vision and the artist became the critic. We all get lost. We see a life that seems so perfect. A life that will finally speak to the happiness we do desperately crave. You think “when I finally make enough money , I’ll be happy and I can do x,y,z” there’s money in your account and you’re still not happy. When you find love and that girl or guy loves just how you imagined , you’ll be complete yet love is never perfect and no one completes you but you . We keep chasing after things unreachable , unrealistic and difficult to maintain.. find your balance. Re-define yourself.. paint that picture over and over while keeping you in mind. You maybe lost .. but only you can rediscover your true self. Go find it. Stop allowing what could be or what should the only thing you can see, because it can be anything. Stop limiting yourself. Stop defining your life based on the terms of others. If its important to you make it a priority. If it hurts you let it go. We are so much more than what we allow ourselves to be. It's not your partner, parent, friends etc. Its who you allow to obtain the power to define what your life will be. It all comes back to you. When you lost that, you lost your direction, your purpose, the thing that makes you, you. Go find it.